Unmarried couples: property and children
Key facts
- There is no such thing as common law marriage in England and Wales. Living together, however long, does not create the financial rights that marriage brings.
- Unmarried partners have no automatic claim on each other’s income, pension or assets when they separate.
- Property is divided according to legal ownership and any beneficial interest under trusts law, mainly the Trusts of Land and Appointment of Trustees Act 1996.
- Financial claims for the benefit of children run under Schedule 1 of the Children Act 1989, separate from child maintenance.
- Mediation can cover the home, other property and arrangements for children, and put the outcome in writing.
More couples than ever live together without marrying, yet many assume that after a few years they gain the same rights as a married couple. They do not. The law treats unmarried partners very differently, and the gap comes as a shock to a lot of people when a relationship ends. This page explains where you actually stand on property and children, and how mediation can help sort things out. It forms part of our wider guide to mediation in different situations.
The common law marriage myth
Let us clear up the biggest misunderstanding first. There is no such thing as common law marriage in England and Wales. It does not matter whether you have lived together for two years or twenty, whether you have children, or whether you call each other husband or wife. Unless you are legally married or in a civil partnership, you do not have the financial claims against each other that marriage creates.
This means that on separation, an unmarried partner cannot ask for a share of the other’s pension, cannot claim spousal maintenance, and has no automatic right to a share of assets held in the other person’s sole name. Instead, two quite different areas of law apply: trusts law for property, and the Children Act 1989 for anything to do with the children.
Who owns the home?
The family home is usually the largest asset and the most contested. For unmarried couples, the starting point is simple legal ownership: whose name is on the title. If you own the property as joint legal owners, you both have a share, though the size of each share can still be argued. If only one of you is the legal owner, the other has no automatic right to it.
The other person may, however, be able to claim a beneficial interest, a share based on contributions or a common intention that the property would be shared. These claims are governed by the Trusts of Land and Appointment of Trustees Act 1996, usually shortened to TOLATA. They can be difficult to prove and often turn on detailed evidence about what was said and paid over the years. Our guide to options for the family home looks at the practical choices, from selling to buying the other out.
Disputes about property between unmarried couples are dealt with under the Trusts of Land and Appointment of Trustees Act 1996 (TOLATA). Section 14 gives the court power to decide who has a beneficial interest in a property and whether it should be sold. Unlike divorce, there is no wide discretion to redistribute assets based on fairness or need; the question is strictly about ownership and interests in the property. Financial claims for the benefit of children are separate, and run under Schedule 1 of the Children Act 1989.
| How the home is owned | What it usually means |
|---|---|
| Joint legal owners | Both have a share; the split can be equal or unequal depending on the paperwork and contributions |
| One legal owner | The other has no automatic right, but may claim a beneficial interest under TOLATA |
| Declaration of trust in place | The agreed shares in the trust deed normally decide the outcome |
| Rented home | The tenancy agreement and who is named on it usually govern who can stay |
What counts towards a beneficial interest?
Where only one person is the legal owner, the other has to show a beneficial interest to claim a share. This is not about what feels fair; it is about evidence of a shared intention that the property would be shared, and of contributions made in reliance on that. The kinds of things that can matter include the following.
- Paying towards the deposit or the mortgage, or funding significant improvements to the property.
- A clear agreement or assurance that the home was, or would become, shared between you.
- Acting on that assurance to your own disadvantage, for example giving up your own home or savings.
- How the two of you arranged your finances and ran the household over the years.
Because so much turns on detailed history, these claims are among the hardest and most expensive to argue in court. That is one reason many separating couples prefer to reach agreement between themselves, where each person’s real contribution can be recognised without a costly fight over evidence.
Children come under different rules
When it comes to children, marital status makes no difference. Both parents have the same duties to support their children, and the same ability to seek arrangements about where the children live and how they spend time with each parent. Day-to-day child support is handled through the Child Maintenance Service, and you can read more in our guide to child maintenance and mediation.
On top of maintenance, a parent can apply under Schedule 1 of the Children Act 1989 for financial provision for a child. This can include help with housing, lump sums for specific needs, or payment of certain expenses. It is always for the benefit of the child, not the parent, and the housing provided usually reverts to the paying parent when the child grows up. For arrangements about time with each parent, see child arrangements and mediation.
How mediation helps unmarried couples
Because the law offers unmarried couples little of the structured framework that divorce provides, reaching agreement between yourselves is often the most practical route. Financial mediation lets the two of you work through the home, savings, debts and support for the children with an impartial mediator, and put the result in writing. That can then be checked by solicitors and, where appropriate, made into a binding arrangement.
Mediation tends to be quicker and far less costly than a contested TOLATA claim, which can run up large legal bills over exactly the kind of he-said-she-said evidence that is hard to resolve in court. It also keeps things more amicable, which matters greatly when there are children who will keep both of you in their lives.
Mediation can also handle the pieces that a court dispute would treat separately. In one process you can work through the home, any joint savings or debts, and the arrangements and support for the children, rather than running parallel cases. The mediator can produce a written summary of what you agree, which your solicitors can then turn into the right kind of binding document, whether that is a declaration of trust for a property or an order for the children.
How mediation works for unmarried couples, step by step
The process is much the same as for any separating couple, adapted to the property and children issues that unmarried partners face.
- Each person attends a separate first meeting, the MIAM, which also screens for safety.
- You gather the basic information: who owns what, what was paid, and any documents such as the title or a trust deed.
- In joint sessions you work through the home, savings, debts and support for the children, one issue at a time.
- The mediator writes up what you agree as a summary, sometimes with an open financial statement of the figures.
- You each take independent legal advice, and your solicitors turn the agreement into the right binding document.
Cohabitation agreements and protecting yourself
One lesson many unmarried couples take from separation is how much clearer things are when ownership and intentions are written down from the start. A declaration of trust setting out each person’s share in a property, or a cohabitation agreement recording what would happen if you separate, can save enormous stress later. These are not romantic documents, but they remove the uncertainty that makes separation between unmarried partners so contentious.
| What to record | Why it helps |
|---|---|
| Each person’s share in the home | Removes later argument about who owns what |
| Who pays the mortgage, bills and repairs | Shows how contributions were meant to count |
| What happens to the home if you separate | Sets out whether it is sold or one buys the other out |
| How savings, debts and belongings are split | Avoids disputes over everything else you built up together |
If you are separating now, the same principle applies going forward. Putting your agreement in writing, and having it checked and formalised, protects both of you and any children. It is sensible to take independent legal advice on the best way to record what you decide, particularly where property is involved, since the routes differ from those used on divorce.
Common misunderstandings
Beyond the common law marriage myth, a few other misunderstandings catch people out. One is the belief that having children together creates financial rights between the parents. It does not; the children have rights to support, but the parents have none against each other simply as former partners. Another is the idea that paying towards a mortgage automatically earns a share of a property in someone else’s name. It may help support a claim, but it is not automatic, and the outcome depends on the wider evidence of what the two of you intended.
A third is the assumption that a long relationship must count for something in law. Length of time together makes no difference to financial claims between unmarried partners, however unfair that can feel. Understanding the real position early, rather than relying on what feels fair, puts you in a much stronger place to reach a sensible agreement, in mediation or otherwise.
Jo and Daniel had lived together for twelve years and had two children, but never married. The house was in Daniel’s sole name, although Jo had paid into the mortgage and the renovations for years. When they split, Jo assumed she was entitled to half as his common law wife, and was stunned to learn that was not the law. Rather than fight a costly TOLATA claim, they used mediation. Jo set out her contributions, Daniel accepted she had a real stake, and they agreed a share that let her rehouse with the children. The agreement was written up and checked by their solicitors.
Frequently asked questions
Is there such a thing as common law marriage?
No. Common law marriage is a myth in England and Wales. No matter how long you have lived together, unmarried partners do not gain the financial rights that married couples or civil partners have on separation.
What am I entitled to when an unmarried relationship ends?
You have no automatic claim on your former partner’s income, pension or assets simply because you lived together. Property is divided according to who legally owns it and any beneficial interest under trusts law. Claims for the benefit of children can be made under Schedule 1 of the Children Act 1989.
Can mediation help unmarried couples who are separating?
Yes. Mediation can cover the home, other property, and arrangements and support for children, and can produce a written agreement. It is often quicker and less costly than a property dispute in court.
Who gets the house if we are not married?
It depends on how the property is owned. If you are joint legal owners it is usually shared, though the exact split can be argued. If only one of you is the legal owner, the other may still claim a share by showing a beneficial interest, which can be complex.
What is Schedule 1 of the Children Act 1989?
It allows a parent to apply for financial provision for a child, such as help with housing or lump sums, separate from regular child maintenance. It is the main route for financial claims between unmarried parents, always focused on the child rather than the adult.
Can I claim a share if I paid the bills but not the mortgage?
Possibly, but it is not automatic. Paying household bills can form part of the evidence of a shared intention, especially where it freed up the other person to pay the mortgage, but a court looks at the whole picture. These claims turn on detailed evidence and are often better resolved by agreement.
What is a declaration of trust?
A declaration of trust is a legal document that records each person’s share in a property and what happens if it is sold. Where one exists, it normally decides the outcome, which is why it removes much of the uncertainty that otherwise surrounds property owned by an unmarried couple.
Do I have any right to my former partner’s pension if we were not married?
No. Pension sharing is only available to married couples and civil partners. An unmarried partner cannot claim a share of the other’s pension on separation, however long the relationship lasted, which is one of the biggest gaps compared with divorce.
Sources
- Trusts of Land and Appointment of Trustees Act 1996, legislation.gov.uk. Accessed 9 July 2026.
- Children Act 1989, Schedule 1, legislation.gov.uk. Accessed 9 July 2026.
- GOV.UK, Living together and marriage: legal differences, gov.uk. Accessed 9 July 2026.