Online family mediation: how remote sessions work
Key facts
- Online family mediation takes place by video call and is accepted for MIAMs and joint sessions across England and Wales.
- The process is the same as in person: the mediator stays impartial, and you and your ex-partner reach your own agreement.
- All you usually need is a phone, tablet or computer with a camera, a private space and a reasonable internet connection.
- Mediators still screen for safety and can use separate video rooms so the two of you are never on screen together.
- Online sessions remove travel time and can make it easier to fit mediation around work and childcare.
Online family mediation is exactly what it sounds like: family mediation carried out by video call rather than in a meeting room. Since it became widely used, it has become a normal way to mediate, and it is accepted for both the first meeting and the joint sessions that follow, right across England and Wales.
This page explains how remote sessions work, what technology you need, how mediators keep online sessions safe, and what it costs. If you specifically want to know about the first online meeting, see our page on the online MIAM. For how mediation flows from start to finish, see how family mediation works.
What is online family mediation?
Online mediation uses a secure video platform in place of a physical room. The mediator hosts the call, sets the agenda, keeps the discussion balanced and writes up what you agree, just as they would in person. You and your ex-partner join from wherever suits you, which is often your own homes.
It covers the whole process, not just one part of it. That includes the MIAM, the joint sessions where you work through the issues, and the paperwork at the end. The outcome is the same kind of agreement, written up in the same way, with the same legal standing as one reached face to face.
How do online sessions work?
You will usually be sent a link and a time. At the start of a session the mediator checks you can both be seen and heard, confirms you are somewhere private, and reminds you of the ground rules. From there the session runs like any other: one issue at a time, each person given space to speak, the mediator keeping things on track.
Video platforms give the mediator tools that help. They can share their screen to show a draft parenting plan or a summary of figures, use a private chat, and place each of you in a separate breakout room when needed. If emotions rise, the mediator can pause the call and speak to each person alone before bringing everyone back.
Sessions are usually the same length as in person, around an hour to an hour and a half, and you will often have more than one. Between sessions the mediator may send you things to think about or figures to gather, so the video calls themselves are spent on the decisions rather than on paperwork. Because there is no travel at either end, it is often easier to space sessions closely and keep momentum going.
| Feature | How it helps online |
|---|---|
| Screen sharing | Both of you see the same draft plan or figures at once |
| Breakout rooms | The mediator can speak to each of you privately during a session |
| Document sharing | Agreements and disclosure can be sent and reviewed securely |
| Recording ban | Sessions are not recorded, keeping the conversation confidential |
What technology do you need?
Less than people expect. Most sessions work fine on a phone, tablet or laptop with a working camera and microphone. A reasonable internet connection helps, but the mediator can switch to voice only if the video drops. You do not need to install anything complicated, and the mediator will send simple instructions in advance.
Before your session
Find a private, quiet space where you will not be overheard, charge your device or keep it plugged in, and test your camera and microphone beforehand. If children are at home, arrange for them to be looked after so you can speak freely.
Is online mediation safe and effective?
Research and everyday practice suggest online mediation works as well as meeting in person for most families, and some people find it easier. Being in your own home can feel less intimidating than a formal office, and it removes the stress of arriving and leaving at the same time as an ex-partner.
Safeguarding does not take a back seat online. The mediator still screens each person separately before joint work begins, and can run online shuttle mediation using separate video rooms so the two of you never appear on screen together. The mediator will also check that no one else is in the room off camera influencing what you say.
What does online mediation cost?
Online mediation is usually priced the same as in-person mediation, and sometimes a little less because there is no room hire. A MIAM is commonly around £138, and joint sessions vary by provider and region. Many families in cases involving children can also use the Family Mediation Voucher Scheme, worth up to £500 towards joint sessions. You can see the full picture on our cost of family mediation page, or weigh it against the cost of court with our mediation versus court calculator.
Online versus in-person mediation: how they compare
Both routes reach the same kind of agreement and both are accepted by the courts. The choice is about what makes it easier for you to take part and speak freely. The table weighs up the practical differences so you can see which suits your circumstances.
| Online mediation | In-person mediation | |
|---|---|---|
| Travel | None, you join from home | Travel to the mediator’s office |
| Flexibility | Easier to fit around work and childcare | Fixed appointment times |
| Keeping apart safely | Separate video rooms, staggered joining | Two rooms, staggered arrival |
| Reading the room | Good on camera, a little less than in person | Full, face to face |
| Best suited to | Distance, busy schedules, feeling safer at home | Those without a private space or device, or who prefer meeting in person |
Neither option is better in the abstract. Some people find video calls less intimidating than a formal office, while others concentrate better meeting in the same room. Many providers are happy to mix the two, for example a face-to-face first meeting followed by online joint sessions. If safety is a concern, the mediator can run online shuttle mediation whichever route you choose.
Step by step: your first online session
If you have never mediated by video, knowing the shape of a session helps. The mediator does the technical work so you can concentrate on the conversation.
| Step | What happens |
|---|---|
| Before the day | You receive a link, a time and simple joining instructions, and can test your camera and microphone |
| Joining | You enter a secure video meeting; the mediator admits each person and checks you can be seen and heard |
| Privacy check | The mediator confirms you are somewhere private and that no one else is in the room off camera |
| Working through issues | One topic at a time, with screen sharing for a draft plan or figures, and space for each person to speak |
| Private time | If needed, the mediator moves you into a separate breakout room to talk one to one |
| Wrapping up | The mediator summarises what you agreed and explains what happens before the next session |
The rhythm is much the same as an in-person meeting. What changes is that the tools are on screen rather than on the table, and there is no travel at either end, which often makes it easier to keep momentum between sessions.
Common concerns about meeting online
A few worries come up again and again. Most have straightforward answers once you know how mediators run video sessions.
| Concern | How it is handled |
|---|---|
| Someone could be listening off camera | The mediator checks you are alone and can pause if they are unsure |
| The call could be recorded | Recording is not allowed; sessions stay confidential |
| I am not confident with technology | A phone or tablet is enough, and the mediator sends simple instructions |
| We might end up on screen together | Separate video rooms keep you apart where that is safer |
As with any mediation, discussions are confidential and financial proposals are made on a without prejudice basis, so they cannot usually be quoted in court later. Safeguarding screening happens before joint work begins and continues throughout, exactly as it would in person.
Distance, relocation and international cases
Video mediation comes into its own when the two of you no longer live near each other. If one parent has moved for work, or you are discussing a possible move away with the children, online sessions let you keep talking without long journeys. It can also work where one person lives abroad, though time zones and any local legal advice need thinking about, which our guide to international family mediation covers.
Remote sessions also make it easier to keep vulnerable people safe and comfortable. Someone who would find it hard to sit in the same building as an ex-partner can take part from a place where they feel secure, which is one reason video mediation has become a normal option rather than a fallback.
Getting the best from an online session
A little preparation goes a long way with video mediation. Because you are running the room at your end, small things make the conversation smoother and help you stay focused on the decisions rather than the setup.
Choose a quiet, private space where you will not be overheard, and let anyone else in the house know you should not be disturbed. Arrange childcare so you can speak freely, and keep any papers you might need, such as a budget or a draft parenting plan, close to hand. Position your device at eye level with your face well lit, and use headphones if you can, both for privacy and for clearer sound. If you think you may become upset, it can help to have a glass of water and a notepad nearby, and to remember that the mediator can pause the call whenever you need a moment.
If a session runs long or feelings rise, the mediator can break it into shorter meetings spread over a few days, which is often easier online than in person. The aim is the same as always: a calm space in which the two of you can reach your own agreement.
Aisha had moved 200 miles away for a new job when she and her former partner needed to sort out arrangements for their daughter. Travelling back for meetings would have meant days off work and a long drive. Their mediator offered online sessions instead. They met by video over four evenings, shared a draft parenting plan on screen, and reached an agreement without either of them leaving home. Aisha said the flexibility was the only reason she could take part at all.
Frequently asked questions
Is online family mediation accepted for court?
Yes. A MIAM and mediation carried out online by an accredited mediator carry the same standing as in person. The mediator can sign the same court forms, such as the C100 or Form A, in the same way.
What do I need for online mediation?
A phone, tablet or computer with a camera and microphone, a private space and a reasonable internet connection. The mediator sends a link and simple instructions beforehand.
Is online mediation confidential?
Yes. Sessions are held on a secure platform, are not recorded, and carry the same confidentiality as in-person mediation. The mediator will check that no one else is present off camera.
Can we avoid seeing each other online?
Yes. The mediator can use separate video rooms so the two of you are never on screen together, which is online shuttle mediation. This is often used where there are safety concerns.
Does online mediation cost less?
It is usually priced the same, though sometimes slightly lower because there is no room hire. Many families in child cases can also use the up to £500 voucher scheme towards joint sessions.
Is online mediation as good as meeting in person?
For most families, yes. Research and everyday practice suggest video mediation works as well as meeting in person, and some people find it easier because they are in their own space. Where meeting in person suits you better, that option remains open.
Can I do online mediation from another country?
Often yes. Video mediation can work across borders, so long as you both agree and any time-zone differences are manageable. Where a case has an international element, it is worth taking local legal advice as well, which our international mediation guide explains.
What if my internet connection drops during a session?
The mediator can switch to voice only or pause and reconnect. Sessions are built to cope with the odd technical hitch, and the mediator will always make sure you are both back and settled before continuing.
Sources
- Family Mediation Council, Code of Practice, familymediationcouncil.org.uk. Accessed 9 July 2026.
- GOV.UK, Family mediation, gov.uk. Accessed 9 July 2026.
- GOV.UK, Family Mediation Voucher Scheme, gov.uk. Accessed 9 July 2026.